Dear Church, It's not you it's me

You walk into a new building full of people that love the Lord and you think, "instant friends". The music is awesome, the preaching is amazing, and yet you are left wanting.  So then what?? You think,"This is only the first week, we have to come back again and then someone will talk to us". So you go back the next week and you talk to the nursery workers and they seem nice enough.  You sit through another service, music is still great, the preaching is from the word and challenging, but still no human contact.  The next week the nursery workers know your child and are excited to see him.  He loves it and runs into the nursery and doesn't look back.  So you find yourself asking now what?  As a pastor's kid I always thought it was kind of lame when people would complain about not feeling welcome in a church. I just assumed that every church you went to, everyone knew you.   In fact, until now, every church I have attended I have known people at the church and made friends quickly.  But now I understand the feeling of not really knowing anyone and wondering how to change that.  I have come to a few conclusions. 1. It is not the church's fault.  Let's face it, the church is made up of people, and people are not always welcoming and nice.  It is way easier to talk to people you know on any given Sunday than looking for the people that look lost and shall we say "lonely". 2. So many people feel that it is the church's responsibility to make them feel welcome and they don't have to do anything.  I think this is the common reason that people continue to "church shop".  They expect to come in and find all the things they want in a church and if the 1st, 2nd, or 3rd Sunday does not meet those needs, they move on.  Here is what I think about the whole thing for whatever that is worth.  Good friends are not made overnight.  It is your responsibility to get plugged in.  You also have to do the hard thing.  Talk to people you don't know.  I think what I am getting at is it's what you make of it.  You could continue to go to the church and never make friends or you could choose to step out get plugged in and become part of something bigger than just meeting your need of making friends.  So I guess this is the part where I take my own advice.  Here  is to talking to new people at church this week, and the nursery workers don't count!